Growing up I was exposed to two different worlds, all in one home. I was brought up by my black family and my white family. Both had very different views about almost everything, however, caught in the middle, I still managed to turn out pretty well. With all the conflict going on outside our doorstep, in my house we didn’t see colour. We saw family. There was so much under one roof, we also had an Indian lady who helped with cleaning the house. Just like most people today, I have friends from different race groups. I’ve had partners from other race groups as well. Race has never really been too much of an issue in my life. Yes, there are the odd people who just don’t understand my family and don’t agree with how we are. They give us weird looks and some have the nerve to ask me what it is that I think I’m doing. What the fuck? I’ve been interrogated a few times about my living arrangements from strangers and relatives. As a child, I never knew how to answer any of the awkward questions. That’s mainly because of the harshness in which I received them. I never really quite understood them, so I learnt to just ignore. The truth is, it’s none of their business. I think they knew that because I happened to always be alone when I was asked these things. I’ve learnt to speak to people on a ‘need to know’ basis. I don’t actually need to explain myself to anybody. It’s not always ideal, but it does get me out of unnecessary situations.

Enough about me, the dark cloud of racism is still hovering over us as we speak. I’ve always had hope in my generation. I’ve always thought to myself that even those who didn’t have the privilege of being exposed to what I have been, would be able to move on from what their parents and grandparents went through. Be able to move on from the scars that their parents and grandparents have. Be able to move on from the pain that their parents and grandparents felt. Just one more time….THAT THEIR FUCKING PARENTS AND GRANDPARENTS EXPERIENCED, not them. You weren’t involved, you just know about it. (Don’t get me wrong, I’m not being insensitive- I too have family who lived through all of that unbelievable crap). However, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that we all have different views and different backgrounds. We all have different stories and opinions. It’s frustrating though when people refuse to take a step forward ‘just because’. I understand it’s a lot harder for our elders, but my generation in particular puzzles the shit out of me. We are suppose to be the change that so many people fought and died for. Our future started when we were born and we’re already late. We’re stalling… on purpose. Why? For who? So that we can say we lived through this and that and were part of this movement and whatnot? Isn’t what we are living through good enough? We take so much for granted. We don’t realize what we have. We haven’t the slightest clue. Maybe that’s because what we have is all we’ve ever known. We’re so busy digging up the past that we’re forgetting about the future we have to build. Crying over spilt milk isn’t gonna solve it all. Racism is nothing new, it goes back as far as the 1650’s.

So much has been sacrificed for us, but hey, let’s forget about all of that. Let’s rather put salt on wounds and segregate each other, lets search for racism in every action and word spoken by someone from another race, lets paint our faces black, let’s protest over statues (it’s a fucking statue for goodness sake, this thing can’t even talk! If it wasn’t for Cecil John Rhodes there wouldn’t be UCT). Imagine how far back we’d be if it wasn’t for these people… But hey, let’s just move backwards and relive the past. That would be great, wouldn’t it? That way we’ll leave our mark, coz that’s all we want right? We want to be a part of history. We want to be remembered because we matter too, right? Think of the Kenyan University mass killing, Boko Haram, poverty, – the list is endless. I wish we could put some energy into things like the burning, beating and looting of our fellow South Africans. Changing street names, trying to erase history isn’t going to change anything. What’s done is done. Now we’re going around trying to remove statues as if some golden and just future is hiding under them. Ok so what happens after all of this? Are there less people starving? Is there better education? I’m not saying lets ignore the past, I’m just saying there are other ways of addressing issues. As much as I understand the different sides of all the stories and understand where they are coming from, at the end of the day we still need to move forward.

No, there’s no freedom until we’re equal, but moving backwards is slowing down the process. If we’re like this now, where will Africa be in say the next five years?